Emetophobia and the Fear of Cancer

I may have said this before but my biggest fear of getting cancer is the side effect of vomiting from the treatment and not the obvious one – death.  

Maybe it’s because modern medicine, public awareness, and pre-screening allows for early detection of cancer and that equates to an increased chance of survival.   Cancer is not the death sentence it once was and patients have a much greater chance of vomiting from cancer treatment than dying of the disease.  Actually, that’s very good news, but to us emetophobics, it’s dreadful.     

The thought of vomiting is almost as bad as the thought of dying.  This is a very common thought among sufferers.  If I were really in a situation to pick vomiting or death, of course I would choose to live but the terror in anticipation of the first sign of vomiting would kill me first.   

“An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.”

My kitchen has been taken over by anti-oxidants.  Fruits, vegetables and grains high in these nutrients are in the pantry, refrigerator and on my counter.  I try to live a lifestyle that includes meditation, exercise, immune boosting supplements, and keep a healthy diet not so much to look or feel good, but to prevent cancer or any other illness that could make me vomit.       

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Irritable Bowel Syndrome, a Pre-Cursor to My Emetophobia

A common ailment that tags along with emetophobia is IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). I started suffering with IBS right before I became emetophobic. Most experts agree that stress and anxiety can bring on IBS at anytime and any age. I was in my late 30’s when it started. Coincidentally, it was 3 years ago this month that my IBS came on.

As I had pointed out before in my blog, my emetophobia and IBS were brought on by anxiety and mild depression. It really doesn’t take much to stress me out. So, during August of 2005 a few personal matters played havoc on my colon and the diarrhea and cramping began. For a few months I couldn’t eat much without having to run to the bathroom. And then BAM! The bloated, nauseas feeling of the whole experience scared me into thinking that I would vomit and from then on, I became phobic. I remember the actual December evening this happened and thinking back on it, makes me shiver.

It was that fearful experience that I searched the internet and found out I was emetophobic. Since then my IBS has lessened with mild cases more off than on.

That changed about two weeks ago. The recession, aka “economic slowdown” has me on the edge. It is affecting both my professional life and my personal life giving way to anxiety and depression. My IBS is back but this time full force. The cramping is sudden and more often. My herbal medicine cabinet is stocked with enteric coated peppermint oil, acidophilus, and Charco-caps.

As an Emetophobe, Irritable Bowel Syndrome is more than a mere nuisance. It’s frightening as hell in that most of us fear the stomach cramps and diarrhea just as much as nausea and vomiting as they are the same symptoms of food poisoning and a stomach virus. Everytime I get the cramping, which during the past few weeks has been often, I panic even though I know it’s IBS.

In case you were wondering why I haven’t blogged much in the past 2 weeks (my last blog was a quick cut and paste from another site), it’s because I haven’t been feeling well with the IBS. And on top of that, I have relatives visiting from out of town which means eating out more often.